Down In Mickey’s World –The Trials And Tribulations Of Sand-Bagger Johnson-Part Seven

“Is there any reason, any reason on this good green earth to come down here to Orlando except to play golf, play golf 24/7 if you can so do so, if you can stand the pace, so you can say you had some reason to show up here,” Sand-Bagger Johnson spouted forth from the back seat of the van he was occupying as the dawn was set to come up on another Florida golf day. An Orlando, Florida golf day, a Dizzy (oops) Disney day as he and his compatriots headed toward Disneyland, toward Mickey’s world. Toward Mickey’s world as one of the occupants, Earl the Pearl, who had suffered through previous bouts of Orlando 24/7 golf madness in the vicinity told him when he had inquired about how big a deal the huge Disney project there in the center of Florida was in the area. Big was the reply and as they, Sand-Bagger, Earl the Pearl, Jerry Jeff driving the van (and the one deserving of kudos for taking care of the arrangements for the golf package, housing, van and six round of golf included, airplane fare separately arranged by each party), and the felonious Roger the Dodger (felonious with a golf club in his hand) passed the “Welcome” sign visible for miles around.

They would travel a many a mile and still be in Mickey’s world as Jerry Jeff explained that he knew having been a “good” father he had taken his kids down to Orlando when they were young and knew firsthand how big the property was after shelling out plenty for every damn venue. (Sand-Bagger thinking to himself that thankfully he had only to deal with the California Disney madness since his kids had been raised in that state, he a part-time dad after a messy divorce, which seemed pretty benign compared with what he was confronted with this day-and dawn was still only working its way up the sky scale).

This day’s efforts were to be centered in Mickey’s world, the two fabled old style courses, Palm and Magnolia, managed by the Arnold Palmer Company a name seemingly assuring them of some good golf experiences. As they entered the property (a word that Jerry Jeff and Roger used constantly referring to any bit of land since they were business school professors so what would one expect) and after being cleared at the menacing security outpost arriving at the clubhouse they were immediately inundated with all the Disney comic cartoon character hyp. Sand-Bagger had expected that. What he did not expect when after signing in, grabbing their carts and heading to hit some practice balls to warm up in the early morning light was when they had teed up their balls on the first hole and saw the tee-markers were in the form of Mickey Mouse’s profile. That stark fact would be the case on all thirty-six holes that they played that day and the unusually non-plussed Sand-Bagger spent half the day commenting on that “crass” commercialization. Down in Mickey’s world was right, right as rain.            

Summary for the iterant Casey-one victory two-two-two against Jerry Jeff (as in two dollars front nine, two dollars back nine, two dollars the whole match), a similar lost to Roger the Dodger left him even on the day and only a last minute twenty foot putt saved the day from being a total wash-out as he took a buck off Earl the Pearl in their putting bet. Sand-Bagger once again longed for his regular foursome at Pine Pond where five dollar side bets were not assumed to be highway robbery or some nefarious golf hustle. Selah.